Re-Dedication

Up and down; up and down. After today's meeting, I'm determined to re-dedicating myself to losing weight.

There was no particular reason that I didn't write last week. I just didn't get to it and there was nothing particularly interesting to mull over. I lost .2 last week and gained .8 this week. My total loss is 17.6.

At this week's meeting I spoke up about my up-and-down. The leader, Cinde, who is not my usual leader but who I like and today preferred, asked why. I said I think it's mostly related to my health issues along with losing momentum from the Detoxx Diet. And I told the group that I attend every week because if I didn't my up-and-down would be up-and-up. I explained that I know that attending every week is important; that if this is really a lifestyle change, then going to weekly meetings is part of that new lifestyle; and that I'm always so inspired by the lifetime members who show up every week.

That led to a really interesting discussion (although I adore Karen, it's unlikely we'd have had this discussion in her group because she's more a performer -- an inspirational performer, but a performer nonetheless). Some of the members talked about how they sometimes get discouraged because they lose less than a pound each week and often it's .2 or .4 pounds, but they realize that those fractions add up. Other members, the lifetimers, talked about how hard maintenance is but how motivating it is to have to pay for a meeting when they've gone too far above their goal weight.

One member talked about how she had gotten away from tracking her Points and her weight loss had slowed. Cinde reminded us of the ABCs: All Bites Count. And it was at that moment that I realized I've got to re-dedicate myself to this "journey."

I've spent a good bit of the afternoon planning my menus for the week with eTools. I purposely did not do my weekly grocery shopping after the WW meeting so I could do the planning. And it's not just the planning. I'm also finding new meals to eat so I won't get bored. I'm also including some after-work snacks in my plans so I won't sit down with a bag of Goldfish and eat an uncounted number before dinner (the fact that I eat the Goldfish "made with whole grains" doesn't let me off the Points hook!).

So Much for Core

Gained 3.4 pounds last week. I was not surprised. I had a tough week and succumbed to reward-eating.

I was aware of what was going on and also realized that I was using the Core plan to rationalize my munching. No Point counting? OK! I can eat what I want and as much as I want.

So it's back to counting Points. I like the idea of Core, but I doubt I'll ever be able to succeed with it. For one thing, I don't like the idea of eating non-fat dairy and sugar-free or no-sugar-added (read: artificial sweeteners) "sweets."

I've worked hard over the years to learn to eat healthfully. I'm an inveterate label reader. Trying to follow the Core plan reacquainted me with ingredients lists that were longer than my attention span.

So it's back to Flex. It means that I get to eat only minuscule amounts of full-fat cottage cheese, but at it least it will taste like . . . cottage cheese!

It Wasn't The Core

I mostly stuck to the Core Plan this past week. And I'm working toward doing better at it.

So, why did I lose 2.6 pounds this week, for a total of 21.6?

Ritalin. Yep, I chalk it up to Speed.

A consequence of all the chronic ailments I've acquired is a shortened attention span -- a drastically shortened attention span.

When I saw Dr. Sean this week I told him that I must do something about my inability to concentrate at work. After talking it over he wrote me a prescription for a very small dose of Ritalin, not because he didn't want me to get hooked but because I'm so sensitive to Ritalin-like drugs and supplements.

The first couple of days, I did speed. Now I've come down and I'm experiencing something more like normal energy (although I still pay and pay and pay when I overdo it) -- and I actually have some concentration.

What's not to like? I've lost some weight. I can think more clearly and focus for more than a nanosecond at a time. And, the truly surprising side effect: I'm less achy! I had no idea it might actually improve my fibromyalgia.

Core

I gained 1.6 pounds this week (-19.0 total). Grrrrrrr.

Actually, I thought I might gain more because I fell off the peasant-bread wagon on Wednesday, then participated with gusto in an office potluck lunch and had dinner out on Friday (yesterday, the day before weigh-in, enjoying every single Point of the lemon meringue pie I had at lunch and the vegetable bread pudding I had at dinner . . . ).

So, much as I don't really want to, I'm going to give Core a go for a week, maybe longer if I get into the swing of things.